What We Got

 

Nothing is inevitable if we make a present that ignores the past, that predicts
movement motion going going going forward toward a tomorrow hiding
it’s eyes from the brightness, the myth of what we call life, what we think and
who we pretend to be when we pretend to be ourselves.

The arc of inevitability is never so long as to be gone, to be nowhere, to
be past us…the never…the best “had” we’ve ever had because it is us-ourselves
inside-outside and ever and ever caught in the argument of “here and now” when
we all see that the “then and was” is nothing more than the shadow of our dreams.

And it was
it was and it was
it was never so good as we wanted and
never so bad as we thought
and never exactly what
we remember….but always
always always exactly
what we got.

Inevitability as a theme; a predictable end to an unpredictable beginning, a
missing piece of a jigsaw puzzle without a box without an end without a
mission toward an ending planned and scheduled with lunch breaks and
time to see the sights, have a sandwich, have a moment to think, to look

I like inevitability as it takes out the guessing; the strain-the tension-the stain of
life living through us without us in spite of us just going going going moving
motion in the brightness in the dream with the current and on the rise, upward
and onward, toward and forward breathing living lunging ahead to death.

And it was
it was and it was
it was never so good as we wanted and
never so bad as we thought
and never exactly what
we remember….but always
always always exactly
what we got.

I live a little longer and I see that inevitability is a mask covering my fear, hiding
who I am when I am who I am without thinking or scheming or dreaming or seeming
to live in a world full of time and tempers and lost moments sitting idly by on dusty
dreams on islands of quiet…all waiting to see me fall off the earth.

And it was
it was and it was
it was never so good as we wanted and
never so bad as we thought
and never exactly what
we remember….but always
always
always
always
exactly
what we got.

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