What I want is the machine, the
grinding guttering grabbing
machine that eats time, that
looks at today and
sees meat and plates and
cups of wine and thinks;
dinner time…
I want what we are living through
eaten and
digested and turned
into proteins and carbohydrates
and long chain molecules
so that something
anything
good comes from the pain, the
effortless result of hurting
called life
not my life
the endless dragging shuffling
of millions, billions
toward a death predicted
indicted
because a trick of geography
put them where water isn’t
where health abandoned
where birth is an immediate
death sentence…
that machine or another, one
that makes hopes dreams luck
and ends pain, ends
the need to learn
to suffer
silently…always
looking toward
machinery…we
die against the gears
and wheels
dreaming
of better machines.

A friend of mine, a smart guy I like a lot, is a dyed in the wool liberal with as progressive views as you can possibly get. I like to debate various political viewpoints and I assume he enjoys it as well. Sometimes, however, his overriding liberal principles really show me why I’m not a liberal.

An example is from a while ago.

I started a vigorous political debate in a post I made, not that I remember the details, but I can attest that it was forceful and likely contentious. Half my peeps are red state conservatives, the other half blue dog liberals and the final half somewhere in between (like me) so there is usually some form of “energetic” political argument going on.

This particular debate had become rancorous between two peeps with personal insults flying like honey bees around a trashcan at the zoo. Peeps calling out the other person’s mother almost kind of insults. Needle-like, mean spirited insults.

The conservative peep’s tactic was to just keep slinging them, narrowing the focus after each successful hit. My liberal peep however, did exactly what I would expect a liberal to do in the real world:

He went behind the scenes via messenger to complain to me to make the other guy stop.

Now I say “expect a liberal to do in the real world” because that’s what happens. When a liberal is met with opposition to his perspective (i.e. the public doesn’t want to do what the liberals want them to) they immediately try to use the power of the state (any perceived authority really) to force other people to do what they want. Instead of using the power of persuasion and free speech, they rely on the force of the state to conpell peeps to comply. My peep came to me because it was my page where the argument was held, it was my peeps arguing therefore I was the authority.

What did I say to him?

I replied: “Yeah he can be kind of an asshole but it’s free speech on my wall. Call him an asshole back, disparage his maternal bloodline…or not. It’s up to you…being all free speechy as I am ”

Because that’s the way I roll and because that’s the way America is supposed to work and is one of the things I hate about both political extremes…yes, conservatives do the same damn thing about using state power to make people do things they don’t want to do.

Free speech is a wonderful gift, human right and something we are born with.

Use the shit out of that fucker.

Now don’t get me wrong, I may dislike the liberal political philosophy (as well as the conservative) but that doesn’t stop me from liking peeps. We are not our politics, we are independent, loving, warm human beings all scrabbling on the face of a small rock hurdling through space. We need each other if we’re going to succeed at not destroying each other (roll that around in your brain) so I make this point not out of spite but out of kindness and concern.

Free speech is a truly amazing thing.

Use the shit out of that fucker.

Believe. Go. Do.

~TrevorZen

We
the collective us, a
massive collection,
a mob, glut…
7 billion or
so
we are promises
broken;
kept, we are
intent and
achievement, we
are lost while
found, we hold
ourselves
first…
and deny
this fact
a push pull confrontation
down here in the deeply contentious
mud of humanity, we swarm
we think;
the epitome of
shame…but
love
but…
love rises
the
apogee of endeavor, we
die for ideas, for
forward movement
for the safety
of friends family
truth
we fight with
disregard
and always have
knowing
in spite of books
holy texts & tomes
legend & lore
beside our own
beliefs…
we are
all we have
ever
had.

The sky screams a passage…
a line from the Hindu scripture
the Bhagavad Gita;
Vishnu is trying
to persuade the Prince
to impress him,
she/he takes on his/her multi-armed form
and says,
“Now I am become Death,
the destroyer of worlds.”
and
we think this can’t be real, we know
it is…some of us
and it is us
always us
we think that the divide is growing, is
sinking us into oblivion, the
mask of our own sorrow
but we only see a part
of us
the part we radiate, propagate
while who we love, who we
love…see all of us
like the stars the sky still screaming
we are single and whole
and multitudes
apart
while all plunging forward
in a time spiral toward
death…the destroyer
but we can
sense
can decide
can define
ourselves
away from sadness, madness
the unquenchable…
we can love
and be loved
ultimately facing Vishnu
defiant
connected
and respond to the sky
to the mindless horde all marching forward
“those words, meant to scare and scar,
meant to divide and conquer, they
are meaningless
to people who hold and hope,
who believe
and are believed…
that we are human
and together
regardless
worlds.”

Been thinking about this for a while and only today have I tipped over on the scale where it makes sense…about this election, this new scenario we’re all going to be a part of. I tried to figure out why people voted for Trump, why they didn’t for Hilary…I read as much as I could from both perspectives. I posted questions online and participated in rather lengthy debates about various aspects of the “new world” we’re all being plunged into tomorrow and I think I’ve come to a pretty coherent conclusion. While it could be politely stated that the vote was for change within our federal government, in actuality, the vote was to…

…burn that mother fucker down!

The vote was about the complete rejection of incrementalism, the idea that desperately needed change cannot be carried out civilly, in little pieces at a time. It can’t and it won’t. Ever. The underlying corruption in our government is so deep, so completely and indelibly buried in its DNA that nothing short of complete destruction will ever change anything. Folks, both liberals and conservatives as well as independents and the odd socialist, have tried for the past 60 years and the intense corruption has only gotten worse. All the flowery policies and hopeful programs and the war against drugs and no child left behind and Medicare Part d and on and on and on have been complete and utter failures…simply because they all started from a corrupt base.

They couldn’t succeed.

Donald Trump is a buffoon and quite possibly a psychopath but he’s the perfect delivery vehicle for massive, infrastructure destroying change. He has no allegiances to Big Pharma, Big Oil, Big Agriculture, NATO, NAFTA, the Military Industrial Complex, the UN, the EU, the list goes on and on….including no allegiance to you or I. Donald Trump campaigned without assurance and backing (and future cooperation) from any big money, rent seeking organization simply because…

… NO ONE THOUGHT HE’D WIN.

He’s now in a position to make decisions that no politician before him ever had the chance to make because he is not owned by anyone but his own sense of self-importance and immense ego. He is going to destroy the US government from the inside and not because he wants to but because he has to (whether he knows it or not). The police (the states occupying army), the FBI, NSA, CIA, EPA, Education Department, Treasury Department and on and on have all completely gone off the rails in respect to the Constitution of the United States of America. Taking actions and regulating things that were never imagined by our forefathers, things that never in their wildest dreams were supposed to be within the federal government’s power.

Whether we know it or not…but it feels correct, it feels time…we voted to burn our own houses down because the infestations—the slimy smelly rot that has invaded every nook and cranny—had gotten so fucking bad that another coat of paint, another happy sounding coat of whitewash, just wasn’t going to cut it anymore.

Love it or hate it, tomorrow, Donald Trump lights the match…

…and I have a cupboard full of marshmallows, graham crackers and Hershey bars..

Believe. Go. Do.

~TrevorZen

When we do not understand or know something—basically something we’ve never experienced before—it makes us uncomfortable. And that discomfort is not pleasant at all because we rely on understanding the world around us to survive so anything unanswered could threaten that survival…so…

…that ignorance becomes fear..

Fear is perfectly natural until we ask questions and discover details about it and how it affects our lives, negatively or positively. These questions and answers very soon quickly dispel the fear we feel. Sometimes, however, there are no direct answers to the questions because either we don’t have access to people with answers, or we don’t know how to ask the right questions….and when the thing we fear has been unknown for long enough, we become angry at our discomfort of not knowing…and…

…our fear becomes anger.

Because it is very difficult to be angry at ourselves, we turn the anger outward and focus it on the thing that is the unknown, the thing we fear. We become angry at it for making us so goddamn uncomfortable that we forget and completely dismiss that our anger is merely because we don’t know…that our questions were never asked or answered. When we have been angry long enough, at both the frustration of the unresolved internal conflict as well as the additional uncertainly added about why it’s still unresolved…

…anger becomes hatred.

This is what drives racism, sexism, homophobia, nationalism, and on and on and it’s not because people are intentionally assholes and jerks (well not the majority), but because when they looked for answers, there were none. Or, they grew up with the understanding that there were no answers (and they taught their children the same, over and over) therefore they just didn’t ask questions…they accept the fear, anger and hatred…simply as a part of life.

So…the response to stopping hatred is not simply love…

…it’s answers.

The thing, almost the only thing, that will solve the problems we have related to hatred, fear and anger is education and the ability to provide answers—real answers, not made-up shit to fit an agenda—when people ask questions.

At that moment, when people are deciding whether to fear something or not, there are really only two courses of action to take;

• Continue to fear out of ignorance, or,
• Remove the ignorance so that love remains.

Because love has not gone anywhere…

…like a mask, it’s just been living under layers and layers of hate.

Believe. Go. Do.

~TrevorZen

I can say it I think, finally I can say it and feel good about doing so.
I hate the word “disrespect”

A lot…I hate it a lot.

Now don’t get me wrong, I usually agree with what people mean when they say that word…that someone is acting horrible to them for example…I just hate the word itself. The reason why I dislike the word so much is that when people use it, they are usually using it wrong.

No…strike that…they are ALWAYS using it wrong.

They say “he was disrespecting me” when what they mean is “he wasn’t giving me the respect I know I inherently deserve simply for standing here breathing.”
No one deserves respect simply for being alive. There is nothing automatic about respect so saying something like “I can’t believe how much he was disrespecting me” when they had just met the person is simply moronic. Respect is earned though actions and history…the things we say and do in our lives is what earns us respect, nothing else. You simply cannot be disrespected by someone who doesn’t know who the fuck you are.

Now they can be assholes, jerkoffs, douchebags, idiots, dumb fucks, dickheads, and on and on but they can’t disrespect you if they don’t know you. If you haven’t taught them though your actions and the consequences of your actions to treat you with respect then you simply haven’t earned it from them…and, in fact…

…you may be the asshole…

…jerkoff, douchebag, idiot, dumb fuck, dickhead, etc.

Just sayin 😉

The world changed, the part that matters
to me…the part
that matters I think to
us…the us we voted for
and I’m still not sure what changed
but it all did, it all
is not the same…
…for sure.
I felt the coldness of the steel
bar stool, the shift in
the air…the bristle of others impatience
other’s ideas sitting just
minutes from
eruption…and she talked
it wasn’t me
but the bartender had her words, had
her attention
I had a beer
an idea
a minute more to stay…I borrowed
a word of hers, not
meant for me
she didn’t mind
eventually she told me
she was from Turkey
her smile cast shadows
while lighting
inside parts of me
and another patron argued
he and his friends were angry
afraid,
they felt cheated and alone, his words
came from a greying beard
an untrusting eye
I tried to atone, to change the
trajectory…assert that change
was the only certainty
he said I couldn’t…I was too
white
male
rich
all of that, so I couldn’t know
fear
anger
alone
but I did before that day
before I borrowed a word, felt
a brightness inside
briefly
she was then as she is now
and while it all changed
some things
got very much
better.

It’s amazing, this music thing, with it’s ability to cut across demographics, it’s ability to immediately defeat hate and anger because how the hell do you remain angry singing about love?

This song and this version is probably the best tribute I’ve ever heard simply because it was totally and completely George Michael singing, owning ever single word, every single emotion pushing tears out of my eyes…yet completely and entirely Freddie Mercury’s and Queen’s words and emotions as well.

How can that be?

It’s the power that music holds over us, the chameleon like capability of becoming what we need it to be, what insatiably we require to be nourished when and where it’s required…on our explicit terms yet completely and apologetically without our help.

Saving us when we need a savior.
Demanding retribution when we need to give.
Filling us up when we are empty.
Giving us direction when we are lost.
Comforting us when we are hurt and alone.

2016 has been a rough fucking year for the music that we’ve come to know in our lives, for the voices that have stained our souls with a love and humanity not found in many places…not given out so freely from any other source.

That is music.

That is love.

Our brains, long wired to understand and react to music in a different, life affirming way based on stories sung around campfires in the dawn of mankind itself, our brains are sore and aching from the losses this year, from the silence we feel now that so many voices are gone…leaving faint echoes behind…

…leaving us behind.

A day after the day that gratitude is the theme, I feel sad and lonely that the echoes are all we have left of those voices but also, I feel the love that those voices left and the imprint on my heart and soul…

…and know that I’ve found somebody to love.

Believe. Go. Do.
~TrevorZen

Queen & George Michael – Somebody to Love

It’s not an impossibility, this
life we’re given, it is always
probabilities, wishes,
intent to conquer to achieve
to greatness we look, see
always barriers; ourselves.

It’s an awful thing to hear, the
mortality, this journey’s end,
this road with a known destination
always the same
always the dirt, the clay of
our ancestors, our dreams.

It’s a moment, really, this
life we have, a minute
in the grand archway of
time, from here…to
there…we live within the very
idea of who we are.

It’s you and it is me, and
you are billions…I am
one, yet the difference is mass
not much else, duplicates of us
over and over and the
change occurs in thinking

My body, the same ratio of
water to dry as the earth…
is your body with different
after-market add-ons, with
a different OS level
with different dreams.

I see you in me, feel me
in you when I look out into space
towards where dreams end
our journey’s resting place
and see energy transmuted, matter
reconfigured.

It’s in reality’s nature to not care
about me, about you, about
anything…but to just be…without
artifice, without choice, to
persevere regardless us,
aside and unconcerned.

It’s in our best interest to emulate
to shade with reason, to
try to reach the point where
reality and us
are indistinguishable
are conjoined and the same.

It’s our path to deny the shell
to enlighten the kernel of
who we are when
who we are is
who we should be
alive and made…

…with dreams of reality.